Never make your home in a place. Make a home for yourself inside your own head. You’ll find what you need to furnish it – memory, friends you can trust, love of learning, and other such things. That way it will go with you wherever you journey. – Tad Williams. As always, it is good to be back home. Pretty exhausted after a trans-continental flight but with mixed feelings about my inability to keep you in the loop as desired. Reasons ranging from location and technological restraints are the guilty, however give me a tree and I will carve it on the bark awaiting that one passerby who will not be too busy to just stop for a moment or two.
It is universally acknowledged that money answers all thing but draw the line at making it your mistress or master, that is a path many have walked and never returned. Spent some wonderful moments with family and friends but remember that there are two types of family, the one you were born into without a choice and the one you choose to be part of, nonetheless it is so much joy when there is an intersecting set of both. I have come away rekindled and ablaze with a renewed confidence in this fact – we never walk alone. From the friends made along the way – Bina, Paul, Moses, Christy, Cynthia; the list is endless to those who willingly and unreservedly gave their all just to associate with me during these tumultuous season, I can only but say these “kind acts irrespective of how little they may be always have the ability to send its roots down and yield’
I had a wonderful reunion with friends and brothers who sprung to arms without a thought or two, it has been nigh over 2 decades and yet footprints let behind on the sands of time are never truly eroded no matter how fiercely the wind blows. Como, Cyril, Bubay – my thanks because it’s in the effort, victory lies and whilst you may yet grapple with fitting in this conundrum into your already busy schedule,we can as long as there is a will and no matter how little that spark may be, it has the potential to birth a roaring inferno. I have returned with a brighter perspective, a renewed zeal and a desire to bless as many as I can because what good is gold in our hands when the very next person beside us has but dross in his. We have been blessed to bless and if you are here asking what blessings you have got – be thankful that you can read this, there are many who cannot.
I saw Dr Marion and it was a nice consult. Functional Movement Disorder or Dystonia cannot curb me or put me down and as long as there yet remains breath in these weary bones, my message of hope and encouragement will go on. Permit me to borrow the cheeky words of Paul “when life tosses lemons at you, catch them and make yourself a drink – add some vodka if your predilections tend that way’. For the many who were honourable enough to actually meet me and draw some inspiration, I say thank you for being different. Jummy, for going the extra mile and not being a cry baby (it would have broken my heart). Irene, for being selfless in her job. Stella, for kicking ass on my behalf, LM for seeing me as a person,Shirls for the calls and for EE, the most unique and amazing individual I have come across,, sacrificing all and more. Needless to say that ” I have learned more about love,selflessness and human understanding from the people I have met in this great adventure in the battle against FMD/DYstonia than I ever did in the cutthroat, competitive world in which I spent a great part of my life” – A.P
Her diagnosis – it can get worse because our brains are so unique that if we only knew better, we would treasure each waking moment not by zapping off to eke out funds but to take some minutes and just be thankful. Reach out and plant a seed of goodness in just that one person, be it by asking the usual pleasantries and really listening to the feedback. Undeniably, there are many out there who are as unscrupulous whenever there is an opening but again remember that no matter how thin a slice of bread is, there are always two sides so yet again choose what side you wanna look at. Each day,I am privileged to see champions in life, who having been denied of the very luxuries of every day life, yet are not driven to despair and depression. Out there on social sites, making their voices heard – we can and are entitled to the very best life can give because that is exacty who we were made to be VICTORS in life and regardless of the incessant pains, the apprehensions of tomorrow, the limitations of medical science, there is a truth out there – you are who you choose to be; cervical dystonia or not, rheumatoid arthritis or not, paroxysmal dystonia or not, MS or not. For although our bodies wither away as is the way of this transient life, our spirits are ablaze and ignited with hope that we are not ruled by the strength of our bodies but by the inexhaustible reserves of our spirit in God.
Lacing my own shoes might be an exercise in its own rights but heck! I sure can still lace them. Not having 90 degrees rotation to my neck does not prevent me from teaching myself to process things fast whilst they are still ahead of me. Not being able to put my back through those usual maneuvers has not denied me the fact that I still have a back regardless of the excruciating pain made lighter with the use of traction devices. I may not be able to touch my toes but I sure can see them and they look still as great. Being stared at in public by the ignorant will not drive me to depression, it only affords me the opportunity to increase someone else’s knowledge base and make just that one person more knowledgeable. There are battles out there we fight each and every day and whilst we are all uniquely tosses into our own arenas, remember that
Bullfight critics ranked in rows
Crowd the enormous Plaza full
But only one is there who knows
And he’s the man who fights the bull.
For me,I have my choice and in the words of my pa, it is the side that stays longest in the trenches that wins the battle so for you out there,dig in and keep on repelling waves of attacks upon attacks for in all sincerity, every season has a beginning and an end. To my many followers, my heart goes out to you in appreciation for that kind word, kind gesture, sacrifice. Someday, we will stand arms linked and sing our song of victory because you are part of my story. You give me that boost and drive to do more than I ever thought I would do because I know whom I belong to and I know what His Plans are for me.
Also remember………………we were made to live for His pleasure and not just exist.